Silver Belle and Red Baron

What do these two things have in common?  Nothing really, except they may be the new names of our not one, but two, mini-vans....bring it on...I know you want to make fun of us.  Yes, we gave in to the convenience and affordability of hauling a family of 7 and a family of 7's stuff without having to wonder how we were going to switch vehicles in some parking lot somewhere in order to do life :-)  One is red and one is silver, so the girls are trying to decide between Silver Belle, Hi-Ho Silver, Red Baron, and Red Riding Hood....Brad is voting for Red Baron since he will be driving the red mini-van.

Anyone interested in a 1999 Chrysler 300M?

So I told a friend at work that we don't have a "hot date" car anymore...that is what we tell the girls we are doing when Brad and I go out and leave them with a sitter.  She said we will have to hire a babysitter with a great car and then ask to borrow it for the night out...I like her thinking!  HOWEVER, one of our college student workers was walking by at the time and he said if a babysitter had a "hot date" car we were probably paying her (or, I will add him just to be politically correct) too much...so back to reality with me...I now have two mini-vans!  and no hope for a "hot date" car.  Life is FULL!

We have been working hard to help all the girls understand and work on being a team.  We realized a few weeks back that we were probably at the end of the "honeymoon" stage of the adoption when everyone is pretty happy and getting along relatively well.  Now the work begins to cultivate a cohesion...and work to be incredibly intentional to give each girl their own one on one time as well.  HAHA...I just misspelled intentional as intensional and had to laugh at that irony.  Kudos to everyone who has adopted!  I had no idea how hard this could be...I am so thankful that God has given us so many assurances along the way to help me right now when this is pretty tough.

Thanksgiving time has been great this year...the biggest thing hit me the other day when I got a little email that JCS will be doing free vision screenings soon.  I flashed back to the Christmas season we got a letter saying Kassi had failed that free screening which led us to all the eye patching and appointments in Grand Rapids to see a specialist and then, eventually, her eye surgery to correct the problems with the muscles in her eyes.  I haven't thought about that much lately because everything has been great with her eyes, but that little email set off a huge wave of thankfulness in me... and now I have been counting more blessings ever since.  A new house this year, a need for different vehicles because our family has grown with the pending adoption and, even though there are a lot of growing pains and hard things....we are so blessed!

I have an hour alone with Karly now and she wants me to help her do some Christmas decorating, so I gotta go.  Blessings!

A Series of Unfortunate Events

It was ONE OF THOSE DAYS!  Isn't it funny when people say that and we can totally identify!? Yesterday started off with Vannah and Kenna's room flooded because their humidifier (a large one) had leaked all through the night....then, Kenna was dancing to some music in her room while getting ready for school and threw something out in her neck with all those crazy dance moves.  I was checking my gym bag to make sure it was packed so I could work out at lunch and I realized a tupperware with blueberries in it had leaked and stained one of my favorite sweatshirts (which I often borrow from Brad...yikes, I'm in trouble).  Brad had to stay home with Kenna who was having trouble moving her arm and her neck, so I had to take Karly to school and I was late for work.  At work we are trying to learn a whole new CRM system, so that has been ooodles of fun...it is definitely hard to teach an OLD DOG (me) new tricks. BUT, I have gone from completely frustrated with it to being able to laugh about it, so that is much better.  I can't say it is better for my co-workers because I am laughing about everything by 3pm and many think I have completely lost it!   Later in the day, Grandma was to pick up Vannah at our house and the other girls at school to take them to dance lessons.  She picked up Vannah and they packed the dance bags...got to the interstate and realized the dance bags were still at our house, so had to turn back to pick them up.  Then, they went to the school to pick up the other girls...they found Danielle, but  Kassi had forgotten it was dance day and jumped on the bus.  Grandma tried to call Brad, but he was in the dentist's chair...haha!  Grandma and Vannah thought to check at the office and they called the bus driver to say they will pick Kassi up at the HS where the bus stops to transfer students. Meanwhile, Kassi realizes she is on the bus and she shouldn't be there and has a good cry.  Danielle tells me she lost her gloves somewhere...(that was not surprising) that is about the fifth pair she has been through since the weather has been turning colder.  A DAY IN THE LIFE, RIGHT?! CRAZY! These types of days can drive the control freak in me completely bonkers!  Finally, we all made it safely home and were dying laughing about it over pizza.

"So, how do you feel about fizz?"

"LOVE IT, It's like my favorite thing in the whole world!" This one-sided conversation by my middlest had to be the highlight of my weekend.  We had about 12 girls in our house for the Fashionista Birthday Party/Sleepover for Savannah and all the "little" girls were "butlers" (that's what they wanted to be called) for the "models" that came for the fashion show.  Kassi loves to be a part of everything and even though she was warned several times to leave the older girls alone...I found her countless times trying her best to join them. The part about the fizz happened to be my favorite of her attempts to be one of the big girls.  Maybe you had to be there, but she was sitting by all the drinks and one of the 12 year olds came over to get some pop...this is when Kassi decides to strike up a conversation with her....only, the 12 year old didn't have an answer to that question, so Kassi just kept going with the response.  You gotta love 7 year olds!  I don't think I will ever be able to pour a glass of pop without thinking...so, how do you feel about fizz?....LOVE IT!

Savannah had a great birthday!  I had to do the mom thing at about 2am and tell the girls they should at least try to get a little sleep...I remember those days, though...trying to see if I could stay up all night....getting tons of snacks and drinking as much pop as I could.  Now that I count my calories, the thought of what I consumed then is a bit terrifying.  It is at this point I could sing a dirge for my lost metabolism :-)  Here are a couple pics from the birthday party.

As you can see, even Kooper ended up wearing a BOA...poor Koop!

My First Rainbow

Karly interrupted our Adult Bible Study on Sunday night to inform all of us that there was a huge rainbow in the sky and that it was the first real one she had ever seen.  It was one of those awesome moments that you could never plan that perfectly and sweetly because our Bible Study was studying God's Sovereignty in our lives.  Not that I would ever encourage her to interrupt, but that was a super special moment.

We have had a fun couple of weeks...I am pretty exhausted, but I am starting to think this is the way life will be for, say, the next 14 years...ha! no big deal!  I just returned home from Walmart and it is 10:35pm...my shopping adventures usually begin after 8pm for the convenience and sanity of having no children along :-)

We celebrated Brad's 40th Birthday weekend with a family party/treasure hunt on Friday.  Savannah and McKenna had planned a timed treasure hunt with coded messaged for Brad to crack.  It was fun to watch him figuring out the messages and then running through the house to find the gifts with a trail of squealing daughters on his tail.  I think it took him about 10 minutes to find 6 gifts...I guess that is pretty fast for the old man :-)  On Saturday, we meet up with a bunch of friends for a game of Whirlyball and dinner at Mongolian BBQ...I loved the mongol/viking-esque foil hat they made for him at M BBQ and I especially enjoyed that the guys at the grill belted out "You are My Sunshine" to celebrate his Bday...so much fun!

I have been super busy at work...so much application processing that my eyes are bugging out by the end of the day and I cannot carry on an intelligible conversation...it will be amazing if this blog is understandable to anyone but myself...ha! I have also been enjoying my responsibilities leading the Cubbies for our church's AWANA program. Last week I was teaching on the topic of creation and specifically, God creating light and so I took a flashlight and let the kids take turns saying, "let there be light!" when they said it, I would shine the light on the palm of their hand and we would all act so surprised that they could do that...then I would let them "throw" the light to someone else and it would land on a friend.  I have no idea why that is so much fun, but if you are a cubbie leader or know someone who is, this is such a fun little activity for 3 and 4 years olds (and 36 year olds as well).

Savannah's birthday is this Friday...we finally settled on a Fashionista Bday party for her and, of course, it has to include duct tape...we are still very into that stuff.  SO, the girls are going to put an outfit together for the runway, but one of their accessories has to be made of duct tape....Savannah's rules :-)

I am loving this time in my life....it is definitely tough sometimes and I am learning some things about myself as our transitions stretch me and make me examine my priorities and my expectations.  I feel like I have had higher highs than ever before....but, also lower lows...especially during those moments I don't feel like I am capable of being a mom to these 5 daughters or a good wife,  or I don't feel like I am holding it all together very well, or I don't feel like I have the time to do it all as well as I want to...BUT, I am learning I don't have to be the one who holds it all together...there is no way I could possibly do that!

Danielle is a very artistic child and her drawings are terrific for her age.  One time someone told me they were concerned about Danielle because she was drawing a lot of her flower pictures with rain and sunshine...they thought the rain was an indication that she was a sad child.  BUT, one day while she was drawing the picture, she told me that she never could decide if she should draw the flower in rain or in sun because it really needed both to be happy.  See how incredible God is!  He takes something like that to reassure you that He is working and you do not have to worry....she wanted her flower in the rain because her flower was actually happy in the rain!  I am thankful that GOD makes beautiful things from sunshine and rain!

The Ducky Duct Tape Business

As I presumed, life would become pretty hectic for us as school began.  We are now starting to develop a routine with the girls and all of our busy schedules.  All the girls' transitions into new schools have gone very well and we are getting rave reports for good behavior from their teachers.

I am loving the Fall and my country drive home...the colors are absolutely fabulous!  I don't know what it is about Fall, but I always have to get those pumpkin pics!

 

                                                                     
Savannah and McKenna have started a new business...the Ducky Duct Tape Business (they even have a jingle).  They make wallets, purses, cell phone covers, flip flops,  ipad sleeves...and anything else you may need.  They would love to be given a challenge, so if you need something made of duct tape, let us know :-)  I thought this business venture would be short-lived, but the girls have been getting orders and filling them and they have even called a business meeting for our whole family to which they proposed starting to do birthday parties and wanting to talk about Christmas sales...haha!

We have two birthdays coming up in October.  Brad turns the big FOUR-O....crazy!  He sure robbed the cradle!  And, Savannah will be turning 12 two weeks after Brad's birthday, so we are excited to be planning some fun celebrations.

Work has been getting pretty busy for me...I would rather be busy than have slow days, so I don't mind it, but I always have to ask God to help me manage my time wisely and not allow me to become anxious about the amount of work I am trying to accomplish in a short amount of time.  The next three months are usually like that for me and then the workload eases.  

As always, I am thankful for your thoughts and prayers.  I may not be able to update my blog as often as I did throughout the summer months, but I wanted to let you know I did not fall off the face of the earth...I have Hello Kitty, Spiderman, and Camouflage duct tape to keep me grounded :-)  I saw this guys shirt a while back and it said, "Silence is golden...duct tape is silver."  That shirt makes me laugh....we have lots of duct tape at our house, but very little silence.

The School Daze

Karly has started school already at Jackson Christian and is enjoying pre-school...she has been waking up early to get ready, so I know she is loving it.  She was not "Hi, my name is scared" like she said she would be...she went to class great and really likes being there.  It is hard to believe my youngest is starting school.  I guess it won't hit me too hard until it is really kindergarten, but still, she is at school for a full day right now.

We are really working on this smile...for some reason Karly likes to stick her lower jaw out when she smiles :-)  

Danielle is really excited to be starting 1st grade in 5 days...she keeps checking the calendar to see how many more days.  She already has a little "boyfriend" in her class that also attends our church and she wanted to put her name tag by his on their desks.  It was pretty funny when I found out from his mom that he purposefully put his name tag at a completely empty table of desks in hopes she would put her name next to his....so I guess the feeling is mutual...yikes.  I already had to have a conversation with Danielle and Kassi about their case of the "boy crazies" and how they need to be focused on what they are learning and treating boys as brothers and friends.  Brad makes fun of me when I lecture on this subject because I was as boy crazy as they come.

McKenna is starting 4th grade and is as goofy and wonderful as ever....she told us when she turned 6 that she would be a goof from 6-9 and then she decided to extend it to 10.  She is the one that always has a silly rhyme or a pun or some kind of joke for us.  I absolutely love her funny personality...and she is the peacemaker.  The only thing that really frustrates her sometimes is when the others aren't getting along and there is nothing she can do to help them get through it.  She takes a lot on her shoulders in trying to solve their little squabbles with her humor.  There are many times I think about how thankful I am to have her in the mix of all the girls...I told Brad one night that I secretly wished McKenna was my age sometimes because I think she would make a great best friend...I love that she doesn't get hung up in trivial things and she can laugh at herself.

Savannah is going to be starting 7th grade and we just had a meeting yesterday with her school counselor to make sure her schedule is all set and tour the school so she will know exactly where she is going.  After our tour, we walked through her schedule one more time just to see if she could follow it.  One of the most exciting things for her is that she will be getting a computer to use.  I was a little surprised that all the students will be receiving a Mac to use throughout their years of middle school and high school.  She tried out for the girl's volleyball team for three days this week and just found out the results last night.  I was really hoping she would make it so she could make some quick friends from being on a team, but there were about 34 girls that tried out and only 14 made it.  She is small for her age and has never played volleyball before besides the few times Brad and I helped her practice serving over the swing set and bumping the ball to each other in a circle.  She has the ability, just not much practice (or height :-P).  Unfortunately, she was cut....but, I was impressed that she did not take it too hard...she is now on to other things...she said, "Well, I know I am good at something, I just have to find out what it is!"  I think that is a pretty good outlook!

I am still seeing God's hand at work.  When Brad and I were taking our adoption training back in February there was another couple in our class that we really admired.  They had already adopted internationally and had to go through the training again because they were trying to get their Foster Care license.  We ate up all their advice and insight.  I knew that the lady was a school counselor, but I had never asked her where she worked.  Through this process of helping Savannah get adjusted and familiar with her new school we had to contact the school counselor for a tour and a meeting for scheduling....guess who it was!  She has been such a blessing and reassurance to us.  It is awesome to know that if Savannah needs someone to talk to at school...God has gifted us with someone with such a great understanding for her!

Savannah also asked to be baptized...she said she was when she was a baby, but didn't really understand it then and she wanted to do it now that she understands.  We were excited to celebrate this time with her as well and with Grandma Phillips, who also decided to be baptized.  Both Kassi and Savannah received new Bibles and Savannah has been reading it and putting post-it notes in it when she finds something that doesn't make sense to her.  We have had some great family discussions over some of the questions she has about what she is reading.  I hope and pray her desire to learn and understand God's Word continues.

Gotta Start Somewhere

My college roommate emailed me to let me know that one of the Olympic Divers was from my hometown, Noblesville, IN.  I checked to see if I might have been in High School with him and then I realized I was probably in High School with his parents...haha!  How sad!  I always think I am the same age as athletes...why is that?  I think drinking from the Fountain of Youth at 14 messed with my mind.

I had to laugh a couple days ago when I read an article about fitness goals for women my age.  The first funny thing to me was that there were only four...however, that was really what kept me reading the article.  The first goal was to hold a plank position for 60 seconds...I love how they time it in seconds instead of minutes to make you feel like you have done more.  So, I tried it.  I started shaking after 26 seconds, but I managed to make it all the way to 60 seconds.....not pretty, but successful.  The next goal was to balance on one foot and hold the "tree" pose for 60 seconds.  Again, not pretty, but I managed to make it through this goal. How can just holding a position make one sweat?  By now I am feeling invigorated and I am on to goal three...10 push ups.  If you are like me you are thinking, girl push ups?  But, no, real push ups...I got through 7 without taking a break.  So, I didn't quite make this goal, but I was so close I could taste it and I felt like it was well within range.  OK, what's the fourth and final goal?  I was excited to scroll down to see it.  It said women my age should run a half marathon...hahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahaa!  At first I thought they misspelled mile.  Shouldn't it be half mile?  How do you jump from the first three goals to go to a half marathon?  Anyway, I am still laughing periodically when I think of those goals, but I am starting to jog.  Gotta start somewhere!

Brad and I have seen and talked to so many people throughout our ministry opportunities that really have great hearts and can even verbalize a ministry they feel incredibly passionate about, but then life happens or it seems so overwhelming that they never act on it.  It is hard to take a first step when the goal is a half-marathon.  But, I am not getting any younger...are you?

Encouragement for Moms

Brad sent me this  "letter to a mom" from Focus on the Family a few weeks ago...I just re-read it and thought it would be a good encouragement to others, so I wanted to post it.  I have loved having the summer to be with the all the girls and help them through the transition, but I have to admit there have been those days that I have seriously longed to be back at work and have the girls back to school.  Before I was a mom, I really had no clue about the work it took to manage a household and raise children....let alone continue to feed an army.  So, if you are a mom and you are reading....you are wonderful and I hope you will find some encouragement in this letter.

Dear Mom,

You are a gift of God to your loved ones and your kids.

But you don’t always feel that way, do you?

There’s a low-level feeling of guilt that creeps into your heart from time to time. Sometimes it bubbles over into tears, usually on lonely, difficult days.

You scan blogs and read books about being a good mom. You find some helpful tidbits here and there, often from women who are grandmothers now. Women you can learn from but who seem to have forgotten the struggle. They seem to have it all together.

In your heart, you want to be the kind of mom who trains up kids to make a difference for the kingdom. You know it’s an honor to be entrusted with these kids. You know you’ve only got one shot. You want to be the mom who teaches them the Bible, models how to pray, and trains them up in the fear of the Lord.

But most of the time you feel like you’re barely holding it all together.

Your house cleaning can’t keep up with your kids’ mess-making.

The kids embarrass you by acting up right when your guests arrive.

Your husband doesn’t get just how worn out you are by the end of the day.

You come to the end of your patience. You lose your temper. Then you feel worse.

The last thing you consider yourself to be is a “good mom.” And you think to yourself, It’ll be a miracle if my kids turn out okay.

And – surprisingly – that’s right where God wants to meet you. The place where you admit your powerlessness and your need for Him.

It’s only by God’s grace that any kid grows up to be a force for the kingdom.

You see, there are no perfect kids and no perfect mothers. No matter what you read in blogs, see in magazines, and learn in books. There are sinful kids and sinful moms and dads.

And the only thing greater than both is the grace of God. The God who says “there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” The God who loves to forgive, to transform, and empower.

God loves you – not because you are a good mother but just because you are His precious child.

God loves you – not because you’ve mastered all the skills of parenting but because He has.

It’s divine grace that will transform your parenting – not guilt.

It’s grace that will keep you going and serving and scrubbing when you’re exhausted and worn out.

It’s grace that will conquer your feelings of inadequacy and remind you of God’s love for you in Christ.

It’s grace that goes for the heart of your kids, not just their behavior.

God has demonstrated the fullness of His love for you through the cross of His Son, even while you were still a sinner.

He has promised you His presence.

He has spoken His approval over you in Christ.

He is the perfect Father who delights in you as a daughter.

Find in Him your Treasure and Joy. Be to others what He is to you.

So walk in freedom. Let Him hold you together when everything seems to be falling apart.

Bask in His unfailing love for you. And rest in His promise of power.

IncrediWorld Amazement Park

Sorry so long since my last post...I have been at IncrediWorld (VBS) at Village Hope Church.  My house has been taken over with Play-Doh, coloring pages, dinosaur masks, and cotton candy :-), but I pray all the kids have hidden some more of God's Word in their hearts.  Savannah was too old for VBS this year, but she was able to be my helper...she had so much fun, sometimes it was hard to remember if she was one of the leaders or one of my Kindergarten/1st grade "park riders".  One night I was upset with her because I couldn't find her when it was time to clean up and I knew she was somewhere in the church with her friends, but another worker put things into perspective for me when he said how nice it was to see her really enjoying herself...that he wondered how many times she had really laughed like that throughout her childhood.  This is one of the hardest parts for me...managing my expectations/structure for all the girls, but seasoning it with enough flexibility for them to be kids for as long as they can be....parenting can be tremendously difficulty sometimes.  I realize I am more of a strict parent than many people, but I also believe children flourish best with consistency and structure, as well as an appropriate respect for authority and given a healthy amount of responsibilites.  These days, I am sure I would be considered "Old School".

We had a good week...a "marker" week of sorts.  Both Savannah and Danielle had their regular counseling sessions this week and both their therapists told me they are doing so well....they do not see the need for more counseling at this time.  That is a huge praise...I am so happy they are adjusting to all the changes and they are able to verbalize their feelings and process them.  It still amazes me that they are able to stay afloat through all the transitions.  Yesterday, on the way to VBS, the song, Stronger, by Mandisa came on the radio and Savannah said, "I think this is my song"..."I think everything I've been through has been to make me a stronger person"...."I can definitely testify to this." Those are the moments to cherish...the times when something makes sense to them.

Danielle, Kassi and Karly are learning to get along as a team...although we have days where their make-believe worlds collide :-)  Brad, donning a very devilish grin for a pastor, made a joke about their imaginary friends not even getting along he was leaving for work one day this past week...fun times!  Sometimes I feel like I have the triplets from the movie, Brave.  Yesterday, after I told them to clean their room I went up to find even more clothes, toys...and even the curtains pulled down because someone thought it would be funny to wrap them around her to play princess....needless to say, toys were removed from their room and now have to be earned back little by little.

I think I mentioned that Savannah may have to testify in court....this has been delayed.  Apparently, new evidence has been submitted that may change this case or the charges.  I am still hopeful that she will not have to testify, but from the appointments we have had so far to prepare her for this possibility, I have been encouraged by her boldness.  If you have been praying for her regarding this situation, thank you!  She could still use prayer, but we do not have a revised date for this to happen. 

Today, with VBS behind us and school right in front of us, we are headed out to do some "Back to School" shopping. 

Picture Updates

I haven't posted any pictures for a while, so finally uploaded some from the last couple of weeks for you...enjoy!

I remember when I would say I was going to lay out I meant on a trampoline with baby oil....I wanted to get as dark a tan as possible....so when these three told me they were going to lay out I had to laugh when I looked out the window and saw this. Soaking in the shade! 

These three drama queens have been practicing two skits for an audition for a new character on Adventures in Odyssey.  They all read for the audition and this is a picture of them after the audition was over.  We won't know if any of them will be a finalist for this new character until October, but who knows...it was a fun experience and they had something to work toward.  They all made great improvements in their reading/acting abilities with Brad's coaching...and a little of my input :-)

I said I would let them have a bubble bath, but then they wanted the jets....a little bubble soap and the jets makes for a ton of bubbles....but, they loved it and I couldn't resist getting a picture after I was sure we were not flooding the bathroom with bubbles :-)

Karly has been making some strides this summer with letter recognition and so I thought this weekend would be a good time for me to sit a while with her and let her give reading a try....we started reading one of Grandma's Dick and Jane books and she took off!  I was kidding her after each "chapter" that we should just close the book because she was growing up too fast...which made her want to read even more.  A while after tucking her in bed for the night I went to check on her and this is what I found...(having to call Brad up to see how I am finding them sleeping has to be in my top 10 favorite parts of being a parent)

I feel a little sorry for Minnie Mouse, but this is a great representation of the phrase, "Can't put a good book down..."  Bet you didn't know those Dick and Jane books were so addictive.

Have a Fosterrific week!

HI, MY NAME IS SCARED

Karly has been super excited to be starting Preschool this fall...she has been looking forward to it every year as she watches her older sisters put on their backpacks and sobs as they leave for school pretty much every morning.  (We do have a lot of drama in our home...I am usually emotionally spent before I start work at 8am  :-)  So, I have been a little surprised this summer that she is starting to show some anxiety about it.  I try to walk them through things that are making them anxious in order to visualize themselves being successful...normally it helps, like this past week they were all scared to jump off the diving board and I told them to just think they were jumping into a huge bowl of their favorite ice cream...their swim teachers thought it was a little strange that they yelled out an ice cream flavor before they jumped, but it worked!... :-)  Karly told me later she yelled, "Rainbow Sherbet, here I come!" I wish I had been right by the diving board to see how it played out with all the girls because all of their stories of it were pretty comical.  BUT this time was so funny.  I had Karly imagine she is walking into her preschool class and I wanted her to practice going up to another kid in her mind and saying "hi, my name is Karly...what's your name?"  So, she starts to say it for me...but, she ends up saying, "Hi, my name is Scared"...I have laughed so hard over that one...imagine if we all actually did that!  OK, maybe it is just funny to me, but I am rolling!  I think it is because I actually feel like this a lot of the time. You have to face your own fears to teach your kids to overcome theirs...that kind-of stinks...no one ever told me that! :-)

You may be proud of me that I am facing my fear of bugs...head on.  Brad has been gone for this weekend and I have been working outdoors even as I am being buzzed by Tracker...err Cicada Killers...I have had to kill spiders and a wasp inside our home while he has been away.  I now have fly swatters located on both levels of our home for easy access and tonight I heard a bug, closed my eyes, and guessed it was a ladybug (they make a distinct noise when they hit the walls...they also have a peculiar smell when you smoosh them....should probably flush them)  Anyway, I was correct!

Today was a great day!  We received news that the judge signed the paperwork to allow the official adoption to begin today....so, the girls can move in with us full-time now...no more 5 nights with us...1 night with the foster parents....I know that sounds confusing.  But, we are done with the visitation period now and on to the beginning of legal status and adoption...this will still take 6 months, but the court sees them as our children now.  This whole process is hard, though.  I will never regret it, but there is so much to it...everyday I have to pray God will help me to handle whatever comes my way and give me strength.  I really should be praying this anyway, so it is really helping me to seek Him as I should.  We have some "hi, my name is scared" days ahead of us.  Because of what Savannah has been through in the past, she must testify in court soon.  We have been working with her and some wonderful counselors to help her become emotionally ready for this, but we could always use prayer :-)  I have been feeling some anxiety over it recently since it is almost upon us...it is much easier for me to have that emotional forcefield around me when I am just reading words in a report, but put the actual people involved in front of me and my little girl having to tell her own story....I think that situation may penetrate any type of forcefield I can muster.  I would really like to be strong for her.  God has been speaking the verse to me that says, seek justice, love mercy, walk humbly with your God.  I think He is trying to help me with my anxiety and to know what to pray for her as well.

McKenna was away at Camp Barakel for a week and Savannah and I had some time in the evenings after the other girls had gone to sleep...so, we started reading a book together that she had picked up from church.  I had no idea what it was about or about the characters in the story, but as we started reading it...one of the main characters was the daughter of a pastor and as we got further into the book we realized she had been adopted.  I got that lump in my throat...and I am getting it again as I am typing this...God is perfection.  She is so excited about that book...I can't even believe it parallels what she is going through right now.  It addresses so many issues that she is dealing with through the character in this story.  I couldn't have picked a better book!  That is a huge praise!  I love when He shows off!

Well, I have already said too much...see why there is no way I could be on twitter...haha!  What would I say? Scared, Killed bug, Ice Cream, Lump in Throat, God's Good...ok, that is so weird to me, but you may have appreciated the brevity.

Grateful for you!

Heather

I Run From Bugs

I am trying to overcome this, but I am sure it is not helping my reputation as a "city girl"...(there is a funny story about me trying to meet some of my country neighbors at a yard sale and one elderly woman taking one look at me and saying "you must be from the city!") that whenever a bug buzzes me, I throw whatever is in my arms....shovel, hose, child...and run for cover as I am telling the girls to make no sudden movements :-)  I am thankful we don't have really close neighbors, but even so, I think the closest neighbors are close enough to enjoy a good show over me jumping around and running through my yard. 

We have what I like to call Tracker Jackers...you can google them as Cicada Killers if you like, though.  I tend to exaggerate things, but these wasps are huge...seriously.  I read that they seldom sting, but they like to intimidate and I certainly exude the smell of fear (or maybe the smell of a cicada...I should check my body wash) to them and am incredibly easy for them to intimidate...haha! So far, we have tried pouring boiling water down their burrows after dark (Brad made me hold the flashlight to find their holes...and I thought they would swam me and I would die because I was the one with the light...I live to blog another day, but so do they), tried to get rid of them with cans of bee and wasp killer (well, Brad has...I just stand at the window and point to where I see them as he is holding, not one, but two cans of the bug killer).  We were probably spending at least 10 dollars to kill one, because they are so hard to pin down with the spray.  So Brad invented a new game...it is really kind-of a red neck game and I am so proud of him.  I like to call it Tracker Jacker Tennis because he uses a tennis raquet to swat at them and then he sprays them as they are stunned on the ground.  Yet another two reasons why I picked him to marry...he is a genius and has the ability to make everything interesting.

So that is where I have been...a little obsessed with Tracker Jackers...aka Cicada Killers....trying to learn as much as I can about them and how to rid my garage and front porch of them.  Fun times!

Savannah and Danielle are doing a great job with the transitions into our home.  You probably noticed I am spelling their names differently now.  We had to sign some paperwork this week and part of it was to issue them/us their new birth certificates.  So, after we had discussed their names and what they wanted and what we would like to do...we all agreed to a couple changes to their names...Savanah is now Savannah Patience-Nicole Foster, and Danelle is now Danielle Elizabeth-Sophia Foster...we are very excited because now all we are waiting on is a signature from the judge and they can move in with us.  That will probably happen this week or next week.

We have our tough days...especially now that the excitement of meeting each other and the newness of it all (and the trip to Florida) is now transitioning into the reality that we are all becoming a real family and we will have to work hard to be a family.  Plus, Savannah and Danielle have been relocated several times and have not been consistently parented in I am not sure how long.  It is interesting to me how trauma and being moved around can affect children....there are all the negative things they have endured, but (when the pendulum shifted) then there are all the well-intentioned people, who out of compassion for what they had been through...gave them everything they wanted thinking it would help to make up for the past.  I totally understand the feelings of compassion, but I don't think the girls are used to being told "no"...it is difficult for them to accept that Brad and I are now their parents and for them to allow us to make decisions for them.  I pray all these things will be sorted out in time, but this summer is a time for me to teach and re-teach and re-teach the same lessons...it is a bit exhausting for me, but I pray that the intensity of the repetition of these lessons will allow for them to transition more quickly into an understanding of what it means to be a part of this family and to have parents who love them...but, not to expect to be given everything they desire instantaneously.  Please pray for Brad and I as we work with them and try to help them to work through some of these things and to have a healthy understanding of a family structure and a healthy understanding of love.

Your thoughts and prayers are greatly appreciated!  God bless you!

Did you know Brad speaks Germanese?

He said something at the dinner table in Spanish and Kassi asked him if that was Germanese.  I just love the things they say sometimes.  We are trying to get settled back in after our Florida trip, but I totally lack motivation to really clean and put everything away...thus I am posting a blog today and trying to make up lots of other things to do this past week like make scrabble tiles with all our names on it for the family room wall and do silhouette drawings of all the girls...(I saw some at Disney and thought I would try my hand at it).  I think the ones I did look a little like cavemen or the evolutionary drawings, so maybe I should have purchased them at Disney...any other ideas?...quick...I need some more creative thoughts...anyone care to assist me in my avoidance measures?!!!  OK, tonight I will clean...I have to.  I have now promised the blogosphere!

Usually I post on all the great things that are happening, but this week has been hard.  I think everyone is tired and cranky, but with that and all the transitions that have and will be happening soon as the girls will be moving in with us for good have come some difficult questions about the future and we have had to define some boundaries that have not been met with much satisfaction... I guess that is the best way to put it.  Some decisions cannot be understood overnight, so it is our prayer that over time Danelle and Savanah will understand why certain decisions were made for them and they will be able to, with God's help, forgive and overcome. 

We talked to them during our trip to Florida and asked them if they would allow us to give them middle names that would be meaningful...something Brad and I would chose as a gift for them and as our prayer for them and their future.  Both girls have agreed to let us do this and so we have chosen Nicole (meaning, victorious) for Savanah and Sophia (meaning, wisdom) for Danelle.

Please join us in praying for them in these ways.  When I try to step into their shoes I wonder how I would have dealt with their circumstances at their ages.  Thank you again for your prayers!  I am off to start cleaning...where do I begin!?

UnANTiciplated, unpleasANT, and unwANTed

You got it, ANTS!  When we travelled through Georgia I had a craving for peaches...who wouldn't, I mean that is just a given!  So, there was a little fruit stand at a place we stopped on the way through Georgia and Brad picked up some peaches for all of us to enjoy.  We ate some of them and then we arrived at our hotel for the night and were excited to go for a swim, so in the unloading process we forgot to bring in the remaining peaches...they were left in our van in a plastic bag.

The next day when we went to pack up our stuff....our van was infested with little ants....you know those lines of ants you see marching around your yard....we had lines of ants in our van.  YIKES!  Of course, it was my fault because I was the one who suggested the peaches...forget the fact that everyone ate some...hey, that makes me feel a bit like Eve, I guess.  So our day of travelling was detained about two hours while Brad took the van for disinfestation detail.  FUN! 

BUT, we made it home, finally :-)  I think overall we were in the van for 53 hours and 13 minutes during our trip...but, who's counting? :-)  Savanah and Danelle wanted to just come home with us this time for good, but we still have to wait for some paperwork to be completed by the state and by a judge for them to move in with us.  Their caseworker thinks this will be accomplished either this week or next week.

Here is another answer to prayer I have not reported yet.  I had our polebarn listed on Craigslist because we have about 5 outbuildings on our property and there is no way we will need all of them.  I didn't know if I would get any bites on it since it would mean someone would have to take it apart and move it to their own property, but the day before we left for our Florida trip we sold it...so, now that we are back in town we have some extra money to start phase 2 of our plans for our home.  We will be beginning to work on both porches and the roof....YAY!  I was really hoping we could get this portion of the renovation completed before the winter....and it looks like we will be able to accomplish this.

We'll see 'em when we see 'em

The great colloquialisms of all time!!...I realized I said that to my girls tonight and thought it sounded a lot like something my mom and dad would have said to me when I was little and was pestering them about when something was about to begin....I was even tempted at one point to say, "if I told you once, I told you a thousand times"...but never actually let that one out of my mouth.  I always wondered what that really means anyway, but now I know.  Tonight it was about fireworks and we were all at Epcot touring around the world...waiting for the fireworks to begin...so we tried to say, "we'll see 'em when we see 'em", in as many different accents as we could think of....my favorites were Scottish, German and Australian. 


We had lots of fun with the girls today...this morning we went to Norway (at Epcot) and enjoyed Breakfast with all the Princesses...we are quite a spectacle on the move...it is funny how many people stop us to ask us if all the girls are ours :-)  Especially when they are all dressed up like Disney Princesses.  Here are a few pics from the morning.

Just so you know...I did not dress up like Snow White for the breakfast...that is an actual Disney Princess :-)  I know, people mistake me for her all the time.

McKenna (Ariel) finding her legs at Epcot...though it was so hot...she would have rather been in the water, I think.

Karly (Belle) I actually think I should have named her that.. it has a nice ring to it....so sorry, it is late and I have been at Epcot all day...forgive the pun!

Savanah (Cinderella) actually did lose a slipper on the stairs...how ironic.  Isn't she a drama queen?

Kassi (Rapunzel) a view from her tower...Ok, it was a short pillar, but you get the idea.

Danelle (Sleeping Beauty) catching up on some MUCH NEEDED rest :-)

I am learning that people don't really appreciate large families.  Every time we have to stop for a bathroom break somewhere...we form an instant long line to the ladies room...restaurants that have "kids eat free" specials hate us, and we just let the girls do some souvenir shopping and spend their own money and the store owners just look at us like..."are you kidding me!"..."we have to ring all these up separately?"  So fun!  I definitely have to get over my concerns about what others think or trying to "not make a scene" because we are way beyond that now.


We are having a lot of fun in Florida and, despite some Princesses not getting the proper amount of beauty sleep from time to time, I think the girls are having a great time too!  Both Savanah and Danelle have been calling Brad and I, dad and mom now....not exclusively...they still will alternate dad and mom with Heather and Brad, but still...it is becoming more natural for them.  We are so pleased they are feeling this level of comfort with us.  This trip is such a blessing for us!    


Happy Independence Day!!!

Time and Rubberbands

Sunday nights are becoming a good reflection time for considering the past week and thanking God for the joys I have experienced.  We were able to have Savanah and Danelle stay with us the whole weekend and I am learning that with 5 daughters there are a million requests for my time.  Can you read a book?  Will you play a game with us?  Can we swim?  Can we do manicures?....Can you make us a sign so we can open a hair salon in our room?...and many...many....many more requests.  On Saturday evening, Savanah asked me if I had time to braid her hair so it would be wavy for church on Sunday.  Any other time, I would have been tempted to say I had other things I needed to do.  I did have a list of things I wanted to try to get done that evening and I had a suspicion that braiding her hair would cause a chain reaction (If you know what I mean).  Sure enough, my suspicion proved to be correct and I ended up searching for enough rubberbands to braid 5 golden heads of hair.

Now comes the payoff story for the time I spent.  Today, Karly and Danelle were in the restroom at church and Karly asked a lady in the bathroom if she liked her hair and the lady reponded, "yes, who did it for you?" to which Karly responded, "my mom"...then Danelle asked the same lady if she liked her hair too...and the lady responded, "yes...and who did your hair?"  and she said, "my mom".  She hasn't actually referred to me this way yet, so I was quite surprised (and happy) to hear she had said that.  I have kind-of been thinking they would probably never call me "mom"...not because they hadn't yet because it is still early in our process of getting to know each other and bonding, but because they are old enough to have pretty strong attachments with their biological parents.  I will be surprised if she begins calling me "mom" regularly any time soon, but that gives me a sweet little hope that we may reach that point eventually.

God never stops surprising me!

Disney World or BUST!

We have been hoping and praying for the last month or so that we would be able to take the girls on vacation with us.  This year we have been preparing to take the girls on a Disney vacation because we felt they were a great age now to truly enjoy the experience.  A terrific family from our church is allowing us to use their timeshare and we had requested special permission for Danelle and Savanah to go with us, but there is always "red tape" and "hoops to jump through" and hoops made of red tape...yep, good luck jumping through those...they are pretty tricky.  They remind me a little bit of the obstacles on America's Ninja Warrior :-) The date we are supposed to leave is coming up pretty quickly and I was starting to wonder if we would ever get permission for this.  We had tried to keep the vacation a secret for some time so as not to cause heartbreak if it didn't work out, but it is incredibly hard, if not impossible, to keep a Disney trip a secret when there are a 4, 6, and 9 year old inside the "cone of silence"....so, word got out and we prayed harder.  The great news is that we got word today that they can come with us.  I am thrilled...(though it is always the 11th hour answered prayer)...God keeps testing my ability to be patient and wait on Him.

In a bible study I am involved in we are starting to study the Parable of the Prodigal Son.  The book takes the perspective that it was spoken more to the "older son" than the "younger son".  Although I believe it is packed with truth no matter where you find yourself and which brother you most closely identify yourself with, it has given me a lot to think about.  I have been given so many "robes, rings, and fattened calves"...Especially lately, I have just been seeing God's hand blessing us with one gift after another and this book has challenged me to understand that the "reward" that should mean the most to me is simply being with the Father, trusting Him, and loving others.  When I do this, He gives me so many more opportunities to be a witness for Him.  It is crazy how taking a step of faith and starting the adoption process has allowed us to share our story with others and, ultimately, be a witness of what God is doing...to give Him glory.

Here are a few new pics of the girls...we had a fun time last week doing nails, shopping, picking flowers...it was a very girlie-girl time...good bonding.

Thank you for your continued prayers!  We are so excited for what God has been doing, but we are also aware that there will be many challenges along the way as this family melds together and each takes on their own role as sisters...and mom and dad too.

The Irony!

Our short meetings with the girls have been going fabulously!  We have been to a softball game, horseback riding, playing frisbee in the yard, to a couple cookouts, and tonight we had a wii dance competition..Brad even made up brackets for it...haha! AND, the complete irony of it all is that out of all the girls dancing in the dance-off...who would you think would win?...BRAD!  I guess complete irony would have been if Kooper would have won, but Brad is a close second.

Something I have learned and am learning is that this process is changing me...for one, just knowing I am following a plan God has clearly laid out for me (as a part of this family) is so fulfilling...it has been a while since I have felt this much fulfillment in my spiritual walk and I have been enjoying this closer walk with God.  BUT, also, with us beginning to see the girls only for short blocks of time...we try to plan our time wisely and we try to spend a lot of time with them and working to bond in different ways.  I have been seeing my "mom" role in a slightly different light as I have realized I had not been making this kind of effort in my time with my girls previously and I see this as a refreshing opportunity to "renew my vows" of mothering.  This renewal is a gift...the complete irony is that just when you think you have really given God a terrific gift...you realize He has "thanked you" with a blessing that is better than the gift you just gave away. 

A Two Blog Night

Not because it was cold (though the cold did send us indoors for our ice cream date with all the girls), but because it was such fun!  Tonight we were able to pick up Danelle and Savannah and let them hang out will with all five of us...I thought the first meeting of all the girls and the interaction would be a little awkward as they may all be a little timid and shy, but do they look timid or shy to you?

Their first meeting couldn't have been more perfect!  We went to Culvers for custard and just as we were finding a (large...haha!) booth...Savannah said her great aunt, great uncle...great grandma and great grandpa were in a booth across the restaurant from us.  I was tempted to be shocked by the coincidence, but then I realized considering this a coincidence now would be close to blasphemy as there have just been so many God-designed appointments and who would have thought that the cold would take us to Culver's and we would meet some of their extended family.  These family members were so grateful and relieved to meet us and to know that the girls would be in a Christian home.  We spent quite a bit of time talking with them. 

After we were finished at Culver's we took a field trip out to our home because the girls have been really curious about their rooms...we just couldn't make them wait any more to see the house.  I was thrilled to realize I have a little interior designer in Savannah...a girl after my own heart!  She had all kinds of ideas of how we could do the upstairs space.  I am not sure if it was a brilliant idea to show them our house because it was then extremely difficult to get them back in their shoes and out the door back to their foster home.  I think everyone is feeling that this is a done deal and it should happen....yesterday!

Thank you for all your prayers...I would say this day has been pretty fosterrific!  The permagrin is making my face hurt!

PART 2 of the Two Blog Night: I have another praise to let you know about as I have been so thankful to know about it this week.  If you have been following this adoption process with us...you will know that at the end of March we were told another family was selected for these girls...and we went through some time of being very sad.  When the agency called to say the other family had not worked out for them about two weeks ago...I was happy for us, but I was concerned that the girls may have felt rejected by this experience.  I learned this week that the girls never knew about the other family.  I learned that there was a case of cold feet for the family and Danelle and Savannah never met them or knew they were in the picture...as far as they know we are the first choice for them.  I have just been so grateful this week that they did not experience anymore loss by having to know that this family decided not to adopt them...God knows what He is doing and His love knows NO bounds.  I praise Him for protecting their little hearts.

Two Days?

Savannah and Danelle (Pronounced like Danielle in case you are wondering...) are incredible young ladies!  Brad and I had a chance to meet them tonight and we felt like we were talking with our girls.  It is surreal to meet your daughters for the first time when they are older.  We talked about our new house, what their rooms are like, their school, their favs (of almost everything we could think of), our girls, Kooper, our church, activities we all enjoy, what our lives were like growing up, our extended family, crooked teeth and cavities, broken bones, how tall we are (or short we are :-) and anything else we could think of in the about two hours we spent together. Toward the end of our conversation we began talking about the next time we could meet and we, along with the foster family, agreed that we could pick them up on Thursday night and take them out for ice cream so they could meet our girls as well.  This is when the conversation got sentimental for me now that I am reliving the whole time...and I am so happy it did...I was hoping there would be some unforgettable moment from our first meeting that I could always treasure...I didn't leave empty-handed...thanks to God.  Danelle said, "Two Days????" (meaning that was going to be too long before we could see them again)...to which Savannah responded, "Well, if you go to bed right now...when you wake up...you can say tomorrow we will see them again and it will only have to be one day."  HOW CAN YOU SAY GOODBYE, or even, SEE YOU LATER TO THAT?  I wished I could have taken them home with us right then.  44 hours is going to seem like an eternity...have I ever mentioned I am working on my patience?

Noteworthy PRAISE!

This week has seemed to drag on as we have been anticipating a call from the adoption agency with an appointment for us to meet the girls for the first time.  Though I have been working on my patience issues..I still have a long way to go...haha!  Anyway, it looks like we will not be able to meet them until next week as they have plans with their foster family (it feels so weird to type that meaning someone else) for the holiday weekend.  The praise, however, is that I am being more patient than Brad...I didn't even email or call the agency this week to find out what was going on and it was driving him crazy to know....haha...just kidding about that being my praise (well, sort-of kidding) ANYWAY, the girls case worker met with them yesterday and told them about us and showed them our picture.  Side note:  When someone asks me to provide a picture for something I always think it would be funny to give them one that is not of me...so, I had this funny thought that I should give them one of the Addams family or something...though I am aging, my maturity level is not keeping up.  I reasoned against scaring the girls with our family portrait....no comments on that, please.  So my real praise is that they are very excited to meet us (even after seeing our picture)...I am sure they will probably experience anxiety when it comes time to start separating from their foster family, but this is still a great praise that they are really looking forward to meeting us.  GOD IS SO GOOD!  I hope you are seeing His divine hand at work in your life as well.

Addendum:  Brad would like for me to clear his name...and he states, "I was not impatient; I was just curious"  Good thing he is not a cat, right?

When it's HIS will...there's a way!

If you have been praying for us and following along with our adoption process, I have some crazy news for you.  Brad and I have been overwhelmed with God's goodness this week as we had a call on Tuesday from our adoption worker asking us if we were still interested in the two girls we had been working to adopt as we were working on our new home during the end of February, March and part of April.  We were working feverishly to get everything done so this would work out and we had been so discouraged and disappointed when we had heard from the agency that another family had been selected.  At the time, I was a little confused with what God was doing because I had felt He had given me clear confirmation that they would be a part of our family.  Kenna said at that time, "Well, maybe God is just giving us some time to get the house ready for them."  AND, even though I had hoped for the same thing...it is really hard to encourage your kids in that direction when you want to protect them from heartbreak and disappointment...so I just said, "Whatever God wants for us is the best plan...it is in His hands."  SO, it was such a surprise last week to hear that we are now back to the point of the agency considering us for them and this time...as a first choice for these two girls. We may have an opportunity to meet them this week...so, please continue to pray for us this week and for the girls as we hear they are feeling pretty anxious over the prospect of being adopted and having more changes in their lives.  Please pray that God will allow for a smooth and healthy transition time for all of us.  Your thoughts and prayers are treasured!

Mother Gothel or Snow White?

Karly thinks she has me down to a science....each day she tries to determine if I am Mother Gothel...

or Snow White...

Apparently, I have a Jekell and Hyde personality...this is so funny to me!  If I am stern with her she calls me Mother Gothel and if we are having fun and she is cuddly or trying to "butter me up" for something she will call me Snow White.  Brad, on the other hand, is only Flynn Rider to the girls....not exactly fair that they always see him as the winsome dreamboat...haha!  What can I say?...I guess I should be happy I am only part witch!  For now...

Being a mom and growing old isn't that bad if you can learn to laugh at life.  This Mother's Day my girls played some little tricks on me with their cards.  Kassi is really big into making her own cards, so I think I got something like 10 cards from her all with picture of frogs in them except for one...since I am not fond of frogs, her big joke is to scare me with them right now...every card said to have a frogulis (frogulous...I think she meant) Mother's Day...then the last card was really cute and she said to me, " this is not a frog"...I thought she was being really sweet until she said, "it is a toad!"

Kenna made a book of all the things she loves about me I thought it was a keeper...except on the front she drew a picture of me with a grubby SAU paint/working shirt on and she put strands of gray hair sticking out of my brown crayola hair-do...she thought she was so clever to even get the details of my gray hairs into her masterpiece. 

Brad and I worked on the house over the weekend because I promised myself to get a few rooms done (and mom has been asking for some new pictures of the progress of our home)...here are a few for you, mom and anyone else who is curious...other rooms aren't picture perfect...(haha...as if that is ever true) yet.

Happy Mother's Day....hope you are having a Snow White...sweet as pie, day!

Everybodys In The HOUSE!

I was at Chuck E Cheese this weekend dancing with my girls to a Rap song with these words in the lyrics and thought it would be a perfect title for my next blog...only our experience this past week has been the great UN-(W)RAP.  We stayed in our new home for the first night on Tuesday and...even though we need shelves in the bathrooms, blinds on our windows and trim throughout the whole house.  We are very happy to be getting settled and to start having some kind of a routine again.  I was hoping to have some new pictures for you, alas...there are boxes and clothing all over the place, we don't have internet yet...and I can't find my camera anyway...haha!  C'est la Vie!  Pictures will be posted soon. 

We are praising God for this home, for all the friends and family members who have helped us work on it to make it ours, and (even though I don't have much elbow grease left) for the ability and health to work on it and the sense of satisfaction over the home's transformation.  We are excited for our family's future as we are still waiting on God in the process to adopt.